


time marches on

by thunderylee



Category: Japanese Actor RPF, KAT-TUN (Band), NewS (Band)
Genre: Angst, Canon Universe, Inception - Freeform, M/M, side reio/rina
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-11-01
Updated: 2010-11-01
Packaged: 2019-01-30 08:59:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12650367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thunderylee/pseuds/thunderylee
Summary: Out of everything in the entire world, Yamapi loved being alive the most.





	time marches on

**Author's Note:**

> reposted from agck.

It was a nice day – sun shining, birds chirping, and all that. Yamapi whistled as he sat in traffic, the top down on his baby and the sounds of everyone else’s radios mixing together in a cacophony of background noise.

He closed his eyes just for a second, a brief blink, and when he opened them, the car in front of him was moving again. He followed dutifully behind, frowning when he was forced to stop in the middle of the intersection. Horns honked but he just shrugged, unable to get out of the way, unbothered by the swears and hand gestures from the unhappy drivers who finally had their blue light.

Yamapi heard rather than saw the SUV coming at him, head whipping to the side to watch the vehicle flying down the wrong side of the street with sirens and flashing lights in the distance. The entire intersection froze, the other drivers’ rages subsiding as the world seemed to move in slow motion and Yamapi sat helpless for the split-second it would have taken for the impact to happen.

Brakes squealed, rubber burned, and Yamapi squeezed his eyes shut to brace himself for a collision that never came. Heart beating madly, he squinted through the smoke to see that the SUV had swerved to avoid him and spun to a stop in the middle of the intersection, hitting no one.

Yamapi clutched his chest, struggling to catch his breath in the filthy air as the traffic in front of him started moving again. He was still panting when he reached the office, staring at the other five members of his group who regarded him in concern.

“Just had a scare on the way here,” he assured them as well as himself. “Miracles happen every day!”

Tegoshi grinned. “As expected of Leader!”

Yamapi found himself enveloped by Koyama’s strong arms, because it was impossible for Koyama to ignore someone who clearly needed a hug, and Yamapi felt a million times better.

Out of everything in the entire world, Yamapi loved being alive the most.

*

“Pi-I-gotta-talk-to-you- _now_ -it’s-super-important.”

Jin’s words rushed out in a single breath, and Yamapi felt tired just listening to him. “You’re not leaving for a few more days,” he said, flashing a smile. “Whatever it is can wait until I’m done eating.”

Jin made a face at Yamapi’s definition of ‘eating’, which didn’t involve actual food, and Yamapi was inclined to agree. But he just sucked on the jelly packet happily, relaxing on his lunch break between back-to-back practices, his only worry being the furrowed brow on his best friend.

“Jin,” he said gently. “It’ll be fine. Let’s meet for dinner – at dinner _time_ anyway.”

“No, I can’t wait,” Jin insisted, leaning down to snatch the packet away from Yamapi’s mouth. Yamapi was about to protest, but then he was sucking on Jin’s tongue and all he could think was that it tasted much better than jelly.

“Cheeseburger?” Yamapi mumbled against Jin’s lips, his hand lifting to thread in Jin’s hair and pull him closer. “With pickles and onions and… mild cheddar cheese.”

Jin just laughed, his smile evident as he leaned in to kiss Yamapi again. This continued for a good while, Yamapi’s head spinning with each flick of Jin’s tongue, until Jin finally pulled away and leaned their foreheads together.

“You’re much more receptive to this than I thought you would be,” Jin said softly.

Yamapi reached for his jelly packet and returned it to his mouth. “The only difference is that now our dinner date is actually a date.”

“Okay,” Jin agreed. “I’ll cook – what do you want to eat?”

Cheeseburgers sounded good.

*

The lights on the Christmas tree sparkled, almost as much as the joy in Jin’s eyes.

“You’re a clingy boyfriend, you know that?” Yamapi teased him, squeezing the grown man in his arms as they settled back to appreciate their hard work. The tree was a little crooked, but both of them pretended not to notice.

“You’re the one who’s always saying things like ‘I miss you’ when I’m gone,” Jin protested into Yamapi’s neck. “I show it differently.”

Yamapi nuzzled his nose against Jin’s cheek until the other lifted his head for a kiss. “I can show it, too,” he said, his voice much lower than normal.

He didn’t mean for it to come out as _promising_ , but the look in Jin’s eyes when he stared at him in disbelief had him becoming more and more approving of the idea. Failing to find the right thing to say, he decided to back up his words by looping his arms around Jin’s neck and pulling him down onto the couch.

Jin was heavy on top of him, soft in places but hard where it mattered. Despite his reputation, Jin had never tried to push him to do more than kissing, for which Yamapi was grateful. He loved Jin with all of his heart, but the act of loving Jin with his body was something he had to get used to mentally and physically.

“I’m ready,” he said out loud, and that was all that needed to be said. He shifted underneath Jin, lining up their groins and eliciting a breathy moan, which was all Jin needed to take control of both the situation and Yamapi’s entire being. From the moment Jin touched him, Yamapi was gone, unable to do anything but _feel_.

When they came together, it was beautiful, and Yamapi knew that this was how he wanted to spend the rest of his life.

*

“I can’t believe my baby sister is getting married,” Yamapi thought out loud, standing next to Jin in their tuxedos. He felt a bit like a stiff penguin, but Rina had insisted.

“I’ll save your seat,” Jin joked, pecking him on the cheek and squeezing his hand before disappearing into the chapel.

Yamapi rocked on the balls of his feet, grateful that he was at least comfortable in his own dress shoes. The music startled him, but the soft touch of satin on his arm was instantly calming.

“You’re acting like this is _your_ wedding, Niichan,” the bride chided him, tugging up her gloves nervously as she took her place next to Yamapi.

Right now, she looked like a beautiful angel, and Yamapi didn’t bother to try and stop the tear falling down his face. “If he hurts you, I’ll kill him,” he said in a completely unsteady voice.

Rina laughed. “Your boyfriend might have something to say about that.”

The doors opened, and Yamapi automatically narrowed his eyes at the miniature Jin who was standing on the alter waiting for them.

Reio suddenly looked terrified, and Yamapi felt better. He walked his sister down the aisle with his head held high, pausing to lift her veil and kiss her forehead before – very, very reluctantly – handing her over to her new husband.

Jin was ready with tissues and a comforting hand on his back. “Be pleased,” he whispered. “Ryo owes us five thousand yen. He bet that you would be a blubbering idiot before they even exchanged vows.”

“How long do I have before the terms are up?” Yamapi asked seriously, and Jin bit back a smile as he reached for Yamapi’s hand. “Don’t make fun of me. You’ll understand when you walk our daughter down the aisle.”

“ _Our_ daughter?” Jin asked carefully.

Yamapi sniffed. “Don’t you want to be a father?”

“Now isn’t exactly the place to discuss this,” Jin hissed. “But yes, I do.”

“Whenever is a good time to discuss it, then,” Yamapi went on. “I already found an adoption agency we can use. They are very discreet and don’t discriminate.”

When Reio kissed his bride, Yamapi wondered if Ryo’s bet had a clause that involved Jin sobbing more than him.

*

It had been a long process of interviews, legalities, and one denial after another, but it was worth it when a chubby pink face waved a fist at them from the other side of the nursery window, the tag on her wrist reading ‘Akanishi’. Both of their foreheads nearly touched the floor with how low they were bowing to the biological mother, who asked them to please take care of their new daughter.

Yamapi watched Jin carefully sit in the passenger seat, a little bundle still in his arms. “Jin, we have to put her in the carseat.”

“I want to hold her,” Jin said stubbornly.

“You will have all the time in the world to hold her,” Yamapi said. “If you don’t put her in the carseat, that time might be very short.”

Grumbling, Jin stepped out of the car and pushed past Yamapi to place the baby girl in her carseat, strap her in, and then check the straps several times before he was satisfied that she wasn’t going anywhere. Yamapi just patted him on the back and hopped into the driver’s seat; he had long since accepted that Jin would hog the baby just like he hogged the covers, the remote control, and the hot water.

But just like all of those things, Yamapi would get to enjoy her _with_ him.

Her name was Yumeno. She took Jin’s surname because there were already enough Yamashitas in the world. Besides, Jin was her daddy in every way except biologically. From the minute he had laid eyes on her in the hospital, he’d been in love.

Yamapi tried not to be too jealous. As it was, they were both busier than ever, which was the main deciding factor in the agencies that refused to allow them to adopt. Jin spent a lot of time overseas, but he was also in control of his own schedule. He had planned on taking a year off when they brought Yumeno home, then touring when Yamapi was free.

They had it all worked out.

“She’s beautiful,” Jin kept saying, grinning down at her as he leaned in to rub his nose on her cheek. “My beautiful princess.”

“Let her sleep, Jin,” Yamapi said pointedly, pulling Jin by the back of his collar away from the crib and across the hall to their room.

Jin was pouting as he got into bed. “I don’t know why I bother sleeping in here. She’s going to wake up in an hour and I’ll just have to go in there and rock her – _oof_.”

He was cut off when Yamapi grabbed onto him, holding him close like a body pillow and instantly falling asleep. When he woke up, he was embracing air, and he found Jin passed out in the rocking chair next to Yumeno’s crib. The baby girl was wide awake and squirming as she looked at Yamapi with big, liquid brown eyes.

If he squinted, they looked like Jin’s.

*

It was a gorgeous sunset – the kind Yamapi has only seen on postcards, the ocean sky streaked with shades of gold, purple, red, and orange. He had been to Hawaii before, but never like this. Not sober, free, and in love.

Jin’s head dropped onto his shoulder, and the scenery got even better. “I can’t believe it’s been five years,” Yamapi mumbled.

“I can,” Jin replied, and Yamapi would have laughed if he didn’t sense the tension coming from the older man. He’d been like this the whole trip. “They’ve been the best five years of my life.”

Yamapi was an unobservant man by nature, floating through life and just trusting that the people around him are true. For five years, to the day, Jin had been saying that he loved him, continuing to come home to him, and raising a family with him. Yamapi never had a reason to question this. Even now, with Jin’s cryptic words and suspicious actions, Yamapi still believed that Jin was here because he wanted to be.

Ironically, that belief continued to shine true as Jin drew figure-eights in the sand and the sky shifted above them. “If you had to choose between dreams or death, which would you pick?”

“Easy,” Yamapi replied. “Dreams.”

Somewhere in the distance, a volcano collapsed.

Jin continued drawing in the sand. “What about dreams or life?”

“Life.” Yamapi inhaled deeply and felt nothing. “You shouldn’t be here, Jin.”

Jin’s finger paused. “What do you mean?”

“This isn’t healthy,” Yamapi told him, frowning as the sun set like it was on fast-forward. The bold colors were quickly fading into dark, and if he didn’t know any better, he would think the world was ending. “It’s one thing for me to grasp onto this… whatever it is, but _you_ -”

“How did you know?” Jin interrupted him. “I was so careful.”

Yamapi sighed. “Don’t you miss the real world?”

“A little,” Jin admitted. “It hurts even worse to be with you and know that it’s not real. When did you figure it out?”

“I always had a feeling.” Yamapi leaned his head against Jin’s, burying his nose in Jin’s hair for what would probably be the last time. “Everything was just a little too _off_. But I kept believing it, wanting to believe it, because it was the only way I could be with you.”

“Tomo-”

“Let me go, Jin,” Yamapi said, kissing Jin’s scalp as the beach started to disappear around them. “You need to live for me now.”

A tear hit the sand. “I love you.”

Jin drew the figure eights in the other direction, and the world went black.

*

“Wake up, Jin,” whispered a choked-up female voice.

The first thing Jin noticed was that the beeps were gone. He lifted his head from the bed, eyes locked on where his fingers were weaved with Yamapi’s.

Yamapi’s mother was tending to her son, brushing his bangs out of his eyes while the doctor put away the life support equipment. “He wouldn’t have wanted to go on like this,” she said. “It’s been three months. This is for the best.”

Jin nodded, using all of his strength to drop Yamapi’s hand and bow his head in a silent goodbye.

Yamashita Rina shoved past him as he made his way out of the room, almost knocking him over. He leaned against the wall to compose himself, closing his eyes and breathing deeply. When he looked again, his brother was standing in front of him.

“You all right, Aniki?” Reio asked awkwardly.

Jin grunted noncommittally. “As all right as I can be.” In the effort to redirect his attention, he narrowed his eyes at Reio. “What are you doing here, anyway?”

Reio pointed into the room. “Rina-chan. We’ve been together for awhile now. We didn’t want you two to find out, but only because he would have kicked my ass and you can’t keep a secret.”

The concept of smiling was so foreign that Jin didn’t recognize it at first, at least in reality, and Reio gave him a look like he’d lost his mind as he actually laughed. “He knew about it,” was all Jin said.

“Oh.” Reio dug the toe of his shoe into the tile. “Anyway, I’m sorry for your loss. I know you loved Pi more than any of those assholes out in the lobby.”

Jin nodded, more to himself than his brother. “Thanks. Tell the assholes I’m going home. I have a flight in the morning.”

He didn’t wait for a response, didn’t say goodbye to Rina or her mom, and didn’t take his eyes off the road the whole way back. A tiny part of him wished that someone would slam into him like they did to Yamapi, just so he didn’t have to be asleep to live the life they never got a chance to lead.

Jin was already warm before his head even hit the pillow, and instantly Yamapi’s face was behind his eyes, bright and smiling and rambling on about something that Jin couldn’t hear because he was so ridiculously in love with him. Jin told him so, over and over again, each time in a different situation and followed by a new sequence of events.

Giving in to his exhaustion, Jin wondered what their fate would be this time.


End file.
